Scribes Valley Publishing

Results of U-Write-It Week 219

"Everybody, put that turkey down!" Granny yelled. "I think I accidently seasoned it with..."

...nail polish remover!"

Everyone dropped the turkey they were about to partake of, and guiltily wiped their fingers on napkins.

But it was too late for little Graham, he had already taken a bite. He made a face.

"I think you did too," he said.

"How on earth did you do that?" asked dad.

"I forgot, and put nail polish remover in an old turkey broth bottle, and when I was cooking the turkey I had a terrible cold, so I couldn't smell a thing! I'm sorry you all."

"Well, at least we have all the fixings!" mom said. "I brought some delicious baked sweet potatoes. I'll go get them."

At this, everyone perked up. Mom brought in the sweet potatoes, and everyone took a huge bite.

"Eeeeww!!!"

by Meredith

...arsenic!"

"But I already ate over half the drumstick!" cried Bob.

"Well, then, I guess we'll find out how good gramma's memory is."

by Jane, Oregon

...cheese-flavored rat poison."

The family stared at her until Uncle Rick spoke up, "Uh, Granny, how could you accidently use the rat poison? What's it doing in the kitchen?"

"It's right where I know it is, so I can grab it when needed, you silly goose."

"Well, if you have to grab it often, we need to check out this rat problem you have."

"Not that many rats," Granny explained. "I just like to have some in case the opportunity arises for a little extra something for supper."

"Oh, Granny," Uncle Rick shouted, "Please tell us you're not eating rats! That's disgusting!"

"It is?"

"Yes, it's very, very disgusting."

"Oh...... While you're passing the nasty turkey this way, you might as well pass up that bowl with the sunflowers on it, too."

by Phillip Lynne, Knoxville, TN

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