Scribes Valley Publishing

Results of U-Write-It Week 204

"My vacation was fantastic," Myron said. "Right up to the time the entertainment director ran in and said..."

...'Sir! Get yer clothes back on, just cause you come up here to the woods don't mean you can run round here in nuttin but a coon skin cap and a smile.'"

"Sorry, Sir." Myron replied with a red face. "I thought I was allowed to be free as a bird around here."

"Well, I guess you are." He said, with a grin from ear to ear."There may not be any gold in them there hills, but there is alot is alot of poisen ivy."

by Brian, May

...'Sammy the Sorcerer is missing his snakes!"

Sammy was a lousy magician Myron had seen the night before. He used all kinds of animals in his act...a rabbit, a few doves, a turtle, and of course, half a dozen pythons.

Myron went back to his room, carefully looking in all dark corners for the missing snakes. Not seeing anything, he went to bed.

The next morning Myron went down for breakfast. There was a special, "Snake and Eggs." Myron laughed. This resort was a low-budget joke. He knew the sign was trying to say, "Steak and Eggs." He played along and ordered the special. Oops! The sign was right, he realized, as the server put a big plate of snake and eggs in front of him. At least he didn't have to worry about Sammy's snakes sneaking up on him anymore!

by Stephi Crippen, Topsham, ME

...'there is a fire, out of control, on the ship. Gather your family and move quickly to the deck.'"

Myron turned to his husband who was beet red from the sun and the sudden rush of anguish.

"Who's big idea was this?" Myron lamented, "a trip of a lifetime, my foot. These are going to be the good ol' days?"

Cole grabbed their son and Myron's hand. Gently guiding Myron and the boy out of the cabin, he replied, "Isn't this better than the Titanic? Let's ride in the lifeboat."

by Dee Moore, OH

...'That tropical storm is now officially a hurricane, and it look's like it's gonna hit us big.'"

I just sat there thinking to myself, "why didn't I pick the European tour. Why did I need to see white sand beaches? And why was I not over talking to that extremely hot woman in the unit accross from me? If I was on my way out, I was gonna go out with a bang!

We made love on the beach and in a hammock in front of a small group of locals. It was so liberating, but when the storm arrived, it turned out to be a little smaller than anticipated. In fact, it had kind of fizzled to a drizzle, which made for kind of an akward rest of the day. Luckily, we didn't allow that to get to us too badly, had dinner that evening, and the rest is history. Twenty years of wedded bliss. Thank all of you for coming, and honey, happy 20th aniversary. I love you."

by Tomas M. Villarreal, Madison, WI

...'In honor of Tom Sawyer we will all meet tomorrow morning at 7:00AM sharp at the old fishing hole. Don't forget your rod and reel and we'll supply the buckets and the bait. Later in the afternoon be sure to join the watermelon seed spitting contest followed by the pie eating contest.'"

Vanessa laughed at visualizing her friend who was a Harvard graduate and now a lawyer on Wall Street stranded at a camp grounds.

"Do you even own a fishing pole?" Vanessa couldn't imagine Myron fishing.

"No," Myron exclaimed with contempt at the mere thought.

"I thought your boss promised you a weekend away at his favorite resort," Vanessa reminded Myron.

"That part is true. He did send me to his idea of paradise. I should have paid attention to the first clue when I entered his office to see a rather large stuffed fish mounted on his wall," Myron explained.

by Ranae Cherry, York, PA

...'Entertain yourselves! I quit!'"

by Christy Kodilanen, Norfolk, VA

...'The ship is sinking fast! Head for the lifeboats and pray to whatever god you choose to believe in!'"

"My goodness!" Katy said. "I see you made it to a lifeboat. Glad to see you're safe. How horrible it must have been for you."

"Nah, it wasn't so bad."

"I can't believe how calm you are!"

"Well," Myron said, sitting down. "It would have been bad if we'd been at sea."

"Oh..."

"Or on a ship."

"Oh."

"Or not at a dude ranch in the Mojave Desert."

"Oh my."

"Yeah. He's currently the new entertainment director on Block C of Psycho Ward B at the hospital."

by Phillip Lynne, Knoxville, TN

Return to U-Write-It

Scribes Valley Publishing Company
Knoxville, TN